The Summer of Failing the Writing Goals.

I’m disappointed by this summer.

I had all these goals. I was suppose to make some serious headway into my new novel.

I was suppose to work on writing a synopsis for Shad and hopefully try sending that around.

I was suppose to work on editing some of my smaller works.

And I did absolutely nothing.

This is very sad for me, because it shouldn’t have been that easy. And maybe I did lack some motivation, and some time. But school really wasn’t that hard. So maybe I’m slightly depressed. I don’t know. But whatever the reason, I didn’t get it done.

Now how bad is that?

If I was paying you for everything that I said I would write but didn’t, I’d be broke. (Though that’s not saying much, considering that I’m almost broke as it is.)  Maybe I’d need to take out a loan.

I think part of my problems is really that I don’t know what to do. I don’t. I think that I need to write a synopsis for Shad and I just stop and think, “What on Earth am I suppose to do here?” Maybe I should ask the english teacher at my school. I’m slowly getting a clue and thinking maybe just writing an outline, and then adding on, and all that would work but I honestly don’t know.

The other problem is all my creative juices are leaving. That quote I posted earlier this week from Orsan Scott Card is pretty much the exact opposite of my life at the moment. I walk through the whole day and get almost no plots.

Or maybe, I’m just walking through the day and I do get plots, but I’m understand all the more that I don’t know how to expand a plot, or do research, or anything like that, so I discard them, because I don’t want to write a bad story.

Anyway it goes, I didn’t write what I wanted to. And I think I sound some like my friend, who said that she’s going to work like frantic this weekend and try to get to her goal of 10,000 words for the summer, when she’s at just 800.

The sad part is, I’m even less than her. 5000 words is all I’ve written this summer.

So maybe I’ll join her on Sunday, when I can write again.

So long as I wake up.